PastSaint.

2009-01-20T08:03:00.000-08:00

AMANDA ROCKS

(happy.?)

I still dream of her.

2009-01-02T23:37:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine once told this to me before,i didnt understaand it,till now.
ABCDEFG -A BOY CAN DO EVERYTHING FOR a GIRL
GFEDCBA -GIRL FORGETS EVERYTHING DONE and CATCHES BOYS AGAIN

Its a new year,
the past supposed to be swept under the rug and left behind.
but that few memorises with her tailed me
as it left me confused with allibies ,
in a condition as bad as my own.

its not that i have given up
not that im afraid to perservere or be sincere
but perserverence can annoy,
sincerity towrds those who wouldnt give turn their hed to you,
is jsut a simple waste of heartache.

i wasnt asking for the world,
but just you.
but its alright go have have your fun,
the puppetier of my heart,
go catch the boys you want,
i'll just wait for an answer to come,
to why am i in love with
the one who is tearing me down.

Love must cursed.

2008-12-23T20:25:00.000-08:00

Holding onto to dream that wont come true.

Ystd was tiring.when to far east with jon and shaun.wtf got trick by jon to rush down to amk,cos he told me he treating jacks place-.-
walao from KFC i ran to jackpsplaces man come on!
haha when wr reached fareast.under the first minute we saw (insert name(:),
hmm speachless much.?well suddenly felt moodless,lifeless so drank a bit with shaun (lovelove)
i cant rmb what i did aft tt but i only know i was on the phone with aqua and clinty( the cute cute de)
till 2 or sth.he tempted me with maggie so i went to get some of my own.finally brushed my teeth and fell aslp.

Just trying to find my way,to anywhere.
But ive come to realise that i was ,alone.
Its getting dark,and im loosing my way.
I havent let you go,as long as you know that.

But im loosing whats left of my diginity.
But ill fight to the end for her heart.
ill never give up for what might be possibly
for better or for worst,
ill endeavor with this curse

Never knew the best wouldnt always get the heart.

2008-12-22T09:19:00.000-08:00

Sadly my hope was crushed.And left destitute in the middle of a mutilated dream.

The tiny colourful electronic bits on my monitor clustered into a picture.
a beautiful picture i could gaze at forever.
it wasnt mom
it wasnt dad.
it was what i have been dreaming of inside.
sadly to say sadly to know
i wished i could forget the myriad amounts of hours i spent hankering over you.
id still give up anything to hold you,
even a minute would worth the world to me.

( its been forever since i last heard your voice )
( its been forever since i last received a text )
( its been forever since ive felt your presence )
( i still wouldnt rather anyone else )
( :D )

Dad got me a new phone today.T700
didnt expect he didnt get me some cool phone much much much better than expected.well thanks a bunch dad. :)
though i know hes still dissapointed in me and depressed,im not doing anything and i feel im a totally asshole.
like i think i understand how he feels,
like when you try your best to please someone when all get back is................
sorry mom
sorry dad

You alone were the only one sitting in my head

2008-12-09T06:15:00.000-08:00

Its not a different scene,just different from what it seems
As the gloomy dark skies invade my morning smiles
i wait to see the stars fall out of the sky just to shine on you.
But behind glass walls,i see the stars lie
as you left along with them.
In the midsts of burning tabaco and nicotine.
i saw your figure walking away as i sat there an ordinary coward.
Crossing my fingers ,
i wished you were free,
so maybe,possibly,hopefully you could be with me.

Today was boring,met at my place and went over to amk.
kpool-ed and Javier came(thanks for the gift btw,really appreciate it)
didnt go for work as we were late.
salcked the night till like 9 or sth.
finally met yingsi's jueyin.sat arnd and headed home.
hungry and cold.but i still do uber feel like having KFC.
awwww.cheekeong.accompany me pleaseee.

Awy.Goodnight,happy reading yea(:

Beautiful way of saying.Sorry but no.

2008-12-08T08:36:00.000-08:00

Its not doing you no good.
hmm lost in space.
gotta get out of this place.
id only stay if you wanted me too.

but awy thanks for putting it nicely.
a nice way of saying no.its alright(perseverance)

How does it feel when your tears run dry.
and isf your heart fell from the sky.
Sitting in this room i think of my Juilet.
Looking out the window,
i see her with the back drop silhoutte.
Now i wait for the drug,
and the change in the pain.
but i was so wrong,
it would only do when youre here.
i'll drag my day for till its past
but i will wait
till you think we can last.

another day as the ice cream man.well it was the best pay ive ever had pathetic17.but that beats than being at home.though my thoughts were always away,i was still selling okay.
awy dads pissed,sis' pms-ing,moms snoring.and well,i guess i found motivation or maybe a broken hearts proclaimation.?hmm well im alright yea(: take all the time you want.

Sleep well and sweet dreams aye(:

AND ILL POST PICTURES SOON.

Id smile even if you suffocated me

2008-12-07T06:11:00.000-08:00

Give you my all.
So watch my chest heave as this last breath leaves me I am trying to be what you're dying to see .
if we burn,ill burn first
Save me this illusion that you gave me keeps saying the same thing
its irrevocable now.what i feel for you.
i cant keep going on this way.
as my heart beat stumbles and my backbone crumbles.
just push that dagger through and itll all be gone.
No one else other than you would i rather be eradicate by,than you.
Yes, he's waved his flag of hatred, but you're the ones who made it
Watch the beauty of all your nightmares passing right before my eyes .
but after the rain falls.
i'll still be here.waiting for you,for sure.

Goodnight(: